The Top 10 Philosophy Questions
of All Time, Answered!
10. How do I know anything really exists? - Kick it *really* hard.
9. What is the essence of being human? - Not understanding the opposite sex.
8. If a tree falls in the forest, and there's no one there to hear it, does it make a sound? - Not if it lands on a bunch of pillows.
7. How do I know I'm not just a brain in a vat, hooked up to a computer simulation of life? - Look in the mirror. If you see a gray, spongy thing in a glass container, you are.
6. Can our minds exist separately from our bodies? - If they coould, we'd just send our minds to class and sleep in every morning.
5. Is there a God? - A billion Hindus can't be wrong.
4. What is the nature of Knowledge? - I'm still trying to figure out the nature of *college*.
3. What is the meaning of life? - All evidence to date suggests it's chocolate.
2. Why get a Philosophy degree? - It's more respectable than a theater degree, but you still get to drink lots of espresso.
1. So, was Kant on drugs or what? - Probably.